“Some people come into our lives and quickly go.
Some stay for a while, leave footprints on our hearts,
and we are never, ever the same.”
~ Flavia Weedn
People come and people go… it’s a fact that isn’t always an easy one to accept; especially when the last thing you want to do is to say goodbye.
But, it’s very much a part of life, that we will have to bid someone at some point in our lives, farewell.
Whether it’s a final goodbye, a decision that we make concerning an individual, or one where someone has made concerning us – goodbyes are inevitable.
Let’s face it; usually, there’s nothing good, fun or easy in having to say our goodbyes.
In my mind, I would rather have it where the people in my life would be there for the rest of my life. I wouldn’t choose to tell anyone goodbye, unless I knew we’d eventually say hello again.
However, with age, I have come to understand a couple of things about saying goodbye.
- There are sometimes we will have to say goodbye, in order to welcome something new into our lives.
- There are other times when whatever we’re saying goodbye to may be drawing us away from who we are to become in the future.
The reality of the word goodbye… although hard to say at times, it’s one of those words that we should become very accustomed and comfortable in saying when the time arrives for us to say it.
For I’m sure there are those who will attest to the fact, that there is nothing more damaging to an individual’s heart, mind, and soul than a missed opportunity to say their goodbyes.
What are you thinking?
How are you about saying goodbyes? Does it come with ease for you or with much difficulty?
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{ 22 comments… read them below or add one }
“Goodbye” was very hard for me to accept when I was younger and with some age & wisdom, I understand how necessary & important it is. I am not afraid of using it these days lol. I’ve learned a lot of lessons from the people & THINGS that I let go, it’s made me a much stronger person and I think that’s why those people & things are only in our lives for a season. It’s my personal belief that God places people & things in our life for a season so we can become wiser & stronger individuals.
Greetings Aaron,
Welcome!
Thanks for sharing your truths with me and the other readers here at RMT. I’m glad to read you’ve learned this life lesson as well, my friend. Life will offer us the option of releasing whatever we’ve reached the season to let go of, but if we insist on clinging to the things that God is trying to purge from us (whether permanently or temporarily), it will get taken away. I’ve learned “to release them” is usually the best and easiest way to go.
As I see it, saying “Goodbye” is just another form of release.
Thank you for loaning your life experience to the discussion. I hope to read you here again soon.
Cheers and Blessings.
Deone recently posted this awesomeness..Releasing the Pain Out of Using the Word Goodbye
Good-byes are one of the hardest things for me, however, they are an important part of life. Good-byes, be they positive or negative, bring change and change is a powerful driving force within us. It’s learning to recognize the good-byes are not alway the end but the begin of many welcomed hellos.
Hey there Gloria,
It’s definitely an important part of life, my friend. We cannot receive the newness life desires to offer us, without being somewhat at peace in releasing any need we might have to control the things and people in our lives. I noticed within myself in the past that it was only difficult for me to say goodbye when I was trying to control what happened in my life. In releasing that control, goodbye has begun to come a lot more easier than before.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on the post, my friend. It’s always great reading you here.
Deone recently posted this awesomeness..What Are You Willing to Learn and Unlearn?
Interesting Deone!
Goodbyes have and are never easy for me. Right from the time I remember, I’ve always had a tough time with goodbyes – but where people are concerned. I guess being the emotional fool that I am, whenever we have to leave home or when we meet our relatives and close family and have to leave, it doesn’t happen with ease for me.
I guess we know that the time has come to leave and bid adieu, yet it gets hard to accept the fact that you are finally leaving. This happens if you’ve stayed with those people for a few days and you are close to them. Happens a lot of time when I visit my Dad etc. I howl for sometime, but then am alright again. But it doesn’t happen with everyone.
Goodbyes aren’t easy, but if you have to embrace something new or start something new, then you need to say your goodbyes to the older things. Yes, that part comes with ease. It’s more of a change that you are willing to make for bringing in the new into your life. You need to close the old chapter, then only can you open a new one.
Thanks for sharing and making us think on this aspect.
Harleena Singh recently posted this awesomeness..Cheap Party Ideas for Kids
Greetings Harleena,
You bring up an excellent point in this discussion. When it comes to parting ways with loved ones we visit, it can surely be difficult to bid “adieu” (thanks for sharing that one
). Yet, in such cases, the upside is that you’ll once again get to see them, and the gladness will certainly be greater the next go around.
It reminds me of the saying about true friendship. With true friendships we are able to go days, weeks, months, even years before seeing them, but whenever the reunion occurs, it’s as if not an hour went by. You are able to pick up from where the last meeting left off. Nonetheless, I completely understand your position with saying goodbye to loved ones.
I also loved how put this, “You need to close the old chapter, then only can you open a new one.” Most life changes we have to face makes goodbyes a challenge to say the least. But if we keep what you stated here in mind, the necessity of closing the old chapter, we will be better prepared to walk towards the new ones.
Thank you for your additional insights to the discussion. You took it deeper and I’m sure will add even more aspects for us all to consider.
Deone recently posted this awesomeness..John Legend “Show Me” Song
I don’t know of a single human being who loves goodbyes. I’ve personally been guilty of hanging onto relationships far too long because I didn’t want to let go. Yet, the people we draw into our lives at any point in time mirror ourselves. They help us see and own parts of ourselves we either don’t want to see (shadows) or are afraid to own (qualities we admire in others which we ourselves have). When their purpose for walking with us is complete, it’s time to say goodbye. Lately, I’ve been contemplating especially patterns that I’ve repeated again and again in the kinds of people I draw into my life to whom I ultimately have to say goodbye because I need to break that pattern. And, so, it’s just like what you wrote, Deone, it’s to make room for something better for me. I can stop drawing these people into my life–and having to say goodbye to them because I’ve learned what I need to learn.
Thank you for sharing your heart again on something we can all relate to and can grow from!
Alice Chan recently posted this awesomeness..Farewell, Independence!
Greetings Alice,
I certainly agree with you there… Although they’ve come a lot easier for me to say these days, I can’t say that I love saying goodbye when the time calls for me to do so. It sounds like we both have had many of “the wrong people in our lives, teaching us some of the right lessons.” But, that’s what life’s about right? Learning from each experience we have.
I do love how you put this though, “the people we draw into our lives at any point in time mirror ourselves.” The thing is I’m currently working on my first novel, and in it there’s a chapter that talks about “The Mirror of Life.” Since beginning this journey of self-discovery I’ve become aware of how our lives only mirror who we are inside. Everything you’ve mentioned really is how I’ve gone about making the changes I’ve made in my life. Whereas, my life used to be overrun with people, these days I’ve only allowed those who “mirror” the values, principles, and behaviors of where I am now. It has made me more attentive to what I’m drawing in other people. You’re absolutely right, we can stop attracting what we don’t want in our lives. It simply takes becoming more aware of who we are as individuals.
I could SO go on and on about this topic in response to your comment, my friend. I really enjoyed reading your thoughts and insights. Thank you for bringing even more to the table of this discussion.
Cheers and Blessings.
Deone recently posted this awesomeness..Just Being Yourself is Always Enough
Well……
I’m a ~super~ sensitive person, so saying goodbye is always hard for me, no matter what the situation or who the person is.
I’ve experienced so many ‘goodbyes’ in my life early on that one would think that I would be conditioned to it, but I’m not.
But you’re right–saying goodbye is inevitable, and it’s something that we have to face at one point or another.
And I totally agree with you about how hurtful a missed opportunity can be. I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye to my Mom, and it is something that makes me emotional at the thought of it even to this very day.
Thank you for sharing your reflections with us!
MELISASource recently posted this awesomeness..Friday of Phrases: Quotes of Inspiration and Motivation
You know what I love about you, Makeba… it’s that whenever I read your words, whether here or at your site, I can feel the emotion that’s being portrayed behind it. Every single word! That’s a gift, my friend. And you were blessed with it.
I also thank you for sharing the “realness” here with me and the rest of the readers of RMT. Your insights drove home the point of the missed opportunities. It means so much to me that you felt free to share them here!
For that, I say THANK YOU. We have never met, but you truly hold a special place in my heart, dear friend. I am so grateful to have cyber met you. <3
Deone recently posted this awesomeness..Opportunity Doesn’t Knock – It Must Be Created and Seized
Like you said it depends on the situation, and there are some where good byes come in. Death I think for me has always been hard, of course there is the hope of seeing them again in heaven. As we get older, we begin to see the people who will have a positive impact on our lives and those who do not have the best intentions for us. These ill wishers, once identified, become easy to say good bye to. I love saying goodbye to this type of person, I tend to feel much better after.
DjRelAt7 recently posted this awesomeness..Our hardships are our lessons to share with others
Hey there Arleis,
Welcome! It’s such a pleasure to read you here at RMT!
I hear you LOUD and CLEAR, my friend. I think goodbyes whereas death is concerned is a hard one for most of us. I was actually present for both my grandmother’s and my mother’s passing away. Although my heart stung with so many emotions, it did help me a lot with future “goodbyes” I had to bid to those who didn’t have, as you so well put it, my “best intentions” in mind. It provided me with an inner strength that would come in handy later. It wasn’t easy, but I am thankful for it nonetheless. Pain is a funny thing, it leaves us stunned and bewildered; but it provides us with a inner power like nothing else in the world would be able to provide.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on the post. I truly appreciate it!
Cheers and Blessings.
Deone recently posted this awesomeness..What Moves You to Think Negatively, Ultimately, Controls You
Goodbyes are always a big burden for me but the way you put it; I can now see all the positive thing happening to me after a goodbye. Thanks for sharing this motivational post.
Hi Fatima,
Welcome! I’m glad to hear you are willing to revisit what goodbyes can sometimes mean. That’s awesome! Thanks for sharing.
Good-bye gets easier when we live in gratitude. When we are thankful for the blessings that have touched our souls more so than the loss we feel at parting. There is no parting. There is only love.
Love you you, my beautiful friend. xo
Shelley recently posted this awesomeness..Blue Girl
I totally agree with you there, Shelley! I think it was Dr. Suess that said, “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” Love will certainly make parting that much more easier, that’s for sure, my friend. Thank you for sharing your light here through your thoughts and insights.
Hi there, I found getting used to saying goodbye easier after I went travelling, you would make so many short but very close friendships and at the start of the journey the goodbye seemed like a wrench, but after a while I learned how to accept and enjoy the transitory nature of the relationships formed, and this of course can apply out to everything in our lives.
Louisa recently posted this awesomeness..Preparing for the Dark of the Year
Awesome way of looking at it, Louisa! I can see how that made saying goodbye a little easier each time. Thanks for sharing that with me and the other readers.
Hi, Deone. Goodbyes are hard for me. I think it because it\’s easier to maintain the status quo than to upset the applecart. I\’ve had to endure some really hard goodbyes lately with a marriage separation and the layoff from my job. But I think you are right that endings can be the start of something better.
Greetings and Welcome, Adriene!
Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts and experiences. They have added more depth and meaning to the post, and for that I am very appreciative.
I sympathize for the recent turn of events that have occurred in your life through goodbyes. I can only imagine how challenging it has all been for you.
May it strengthen you and offer you wisdom, peace, and an abundance of love.
Thanks for sharing your truths so openly.
Deone recently posted this awesomeness..Access Denied: 5 Questions to Stop Assumptions at the Gate
Thanks for all words of wisdom that you people have shared here. For me it has always been really hard to reach the point where its time to say goodbye… But I am sure of that people come into our lives for a reason,.. we can learn something from them and they from us. But I also now that some of them dont stay long and some of them you wish could have stayed forever. But thats life. But the only thing worst then saying to goodbye to somebody special in your life is all the times when you never even got the chance to say those words… Unfortunatly I have experienced that a lot for different reasons, but mostly beacuse of deaths.. To try to get some kind of closure in those situations I wright a goodbye letter to the person that i have lost,.. will never be the same as talking eye to eye, but its a little bit better then nothing..
Hi Sandrita,
Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts here on this with me and the other readers. I’m glad you were able to resonate with the words of wisdom in the post and comments here. I can relate to you having missed many opportunities to say goodbye through deaths. I have had to endure six immediate family members passing over a seven year period myself, so I no how devastating that can be. However, I want to encourage you that your experiences, like mine, have given you a bit of wisdom of your own. Whether it has come to your attention or not yet, I’m not sure, but I can say that it is within you. When you least expect it, it will present itself to you.
I wish you the very best, my friend. I do hope to also read again here soon.
Happy 2013 to you and yours. Make it a great one. Blessings.