I consider myself to be an honest and trustworthy individual.
It was taught to me early in life, by my grandmother. She would ensure… at times insist even, that I treated others, as I myself would have liked to be treated. And while I have tried fervently to be sincere in my actions, behaviors, and in saying what I mean, yet meaning exactly what I say; I’ve been reminded on more occasions than I can count that everyone wasn’t as lucky to have grasped such lessons taught to them. Or, perhaps they choose to apply the lessons a bit more selectively.
That’s not meant to be an insult or criticism towards anyone; in fact, if anything, I am just appreciative to have received such a Golden Lesson, as the one she shared with me.
In spite of the rewarding lessons that were provided to me, I still find myself having to sift out the weeds amongst the fruit bearers in my life.
It’s become a lot easier than it was for me some years ago, but there are still those moments I have regrettably fallen victim to the wrong people, who ended up teaching me the right lessons.
Today, I simply want to share my lessons with you, in hopes it may save you from many of the hard truths I’ve uncovered along the way.
Assumptions Eradicates Relationships
“Assumptions are the termites of relationships.” ~Henry Winkler
For far too long, I would spend countless years, placing my focus, efforts, and energy into convincing people, who I thought, were suppose to love me, how I needed to be loved. The truth is we can’t expect people to love us in the way we intend; especially when they aren’t loving of themselves.
Many people will see what they think to be a “lack of knowledge” on your part, as a form of weakness that they are able to use for their own selfish benefit and gain.
Many times, people will assume they know you, because they know of you or due partly to what you’ve shared with them. But even those closest to you, can’t begin to know you; if they aren’t willing to invest the time, it takes to do so.
Whenever they allow themselves to believe something about you that isn’t in alignment with your character, it becomes fairly easy for them to build their own assumptions about you that are usually based on their false perceptions of who they think you are.
The sad part concerning those that assume they know who we are, is the open door policy and access we often give them, unknowing of the risk we’re taking trying to be the person that desires to show them adoration and respect.
But then, their actions begin letting us know of their refusal of our generosity.
Acts of generosity, nowadays, seem to be gestures that give people the OK to abuse what you may have given to them in the form of friendship, sincerity, love, and compassion.
In most cases, whenever we begin defining and executing our plans for personal development, the skeptics, cynics, and nonbelievers always seem to come out of their hiding place, attempting to make you, the butt of their bad joke.
Don’t be at all surprised or dismayed that those same doubters are usually those who were once the closest ones to you. You’d be surprise of how many people you thought knew you, who would become the very ones leading the angry mob against you.
These are the hard truths, I’m sharing here with you – those things that people often don’t tell you concerning self-discovery and self-growth.
Here’s the thing I’ve learned about these types of individuals though. They have more likely than not, been hurt, abused, manipulated, or have been cast off their own once secure island. They may even feel that their self-invented power over a group is being threatened by you. They have now made it their life mission to inflict as much of what they’ve experienced onto others; yes my friend, unfortunately, you included.
While there are various methods that can be used to combat this type of shrewd behavior in people, the most effective means, (it’s proven to be effective for me, at least) has been to forgive them and release them.
Even when its Difficult, and it will be, Forgive and Release
Forgiveness itself is no easy thing to offer others. We cannot expect the forgiveness we render, to always be returned.
Sometimes the worst feeling we as humans will ever experience, will be our having to offer amnesty to someone who has falsely accused us for doing something we are 100% certain we’d never be capable of doing.
We must steer-clear of our own blame that has possibly been playing like a broken recorder in our conscious. Unless we let go of the victim within us, (“They did me wrong” or “How could I have been so stupid”), letting go of the past and everything that occurred therein. Simply because, what happened is over, and we made it through it with our lives.
We must release ourselves from being “the victim”; if not, our future holds more instances for us to be one, once again.
We must know that in letting go of the negative impact that has the potential to imprison us, if it hasn’t already; that we alone hold the keys to our own happiness.
The most important thing to know is this… you aren’t in any way obligated to allow yourself to be mistreated, misused, or devalued by anyone.
If you’re currently experiencing these feelings or similar, you need only know that, you have the power of choice available, to change what may have many aspects of your life entangled and bound up.
Do yourself a favor. Free Yourself Up. Take back the control that’s always been yours. It cannot be taken away, unless you relinquish it to those that know how much it’s worth to you.
Releasing doesn’t mean that it’s the end butterfly, it means that something and someone worthy of your awesomeness, is waiting on your arrival to your brilliant future.
Don’t keep everything that’s waiting on you in the future, waiting too long though.
Realize the potential you have in forgiveness and releasing what will not serve you greatly tomorrow.
I’d love to here your thoughts on forgiveness and releasing those who’s actions speak louder than their words. Share your feedback below, and assist me in helping someone else, with your experiences. Not everyone that reads RMT, leaves their thoughts. Many come to receive their own releasing moments. Share your release with them.